pumpkinhead's Un-Tribute to JRK

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

It has been a while!

Hi everyone!

Sorry, I've been working at my work a lot lately. Even though I just finished college, I'm still working for my parents. They own a new business and need the help, so I'm putting my college degree to the use for them. I think it's been worth it so far, even though I've missed all the web. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to write on my blog at all lately. Also, my copy of Half Blood Worst Story Ever was lent out to a co-worker so she could read about the terribly tragic turn of events held there-in. So now that I have it back, I can restart marshing evidence against all the TROLLS around here. But hey, I don't mind the trolls, it's like having a piece of JRK's magical world right here on the internet. You know what? I don't mind the rest of her magical writings at all, in fact I love them because I am a TRUE FAN. But since the afwul, mendatious touring away from the long obvious truth in the latest "book" her magical writings have been stained with tabloid style scandalous stupid "love" stories.

Does anybody else get the sense that when they were reading the latest installation of JRK's series that they were actually reading something from the checking out counter at their local shopping place?

It's like all of a sudden, thanks to a total crossing of everything that had gone before that TRUE FANS held dearest, JRK, the most selling author of all time, had suddenly changed from a best-selling author into a writer for the National Inquirer. Or more likely, something like People or Us! Weekly. I wouldnt be surprised to see a picture of Jessica Simpson or Tom Cruise together on the pages of Half-Assed Effort, it was like the authoring of this piece was aimed at creating scandal. Is Ron and Hermione supposed to be a love story, or is it like some silly reality TV show we are supposed to be liking to entertain us?

Ok, now that I have time to go through my copy of the worst book with my find tooth comb, I can show all the small brained troll users that they are pathetically, pitibly wrong. I'm pretty happy that I have the time to get back to being a TRUE FAN, and I hope you guys can join me along the ways.

P.S.: somebody in comments said I went to Princeton. That's not true, but they're "close". Whoever guesses my college first wins a free chance to guest-blog on this blog!

Oh and yes I make spelling mistakes. Sorry if I'm not as smart at that stuff as you are, it's not like trolls need to be able to spell properly anyways.

posted by pumpkinhead at 10:58 PM

24 Comments:

  • I just read your first post, and the rest, but I pretty much skimmed them, they are after all total crap. Anyway I have only one thing to say to you. YOU CRIED FOR AN HOUR BECAUSE TWO FICTIONAL CHARACTERS DID NOT END UP TOGETHER? HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLE TRY TO GET PEOPLE TO TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY WHEN YOUR LIFE AND HAPPINESS APPARENTLEY REVOLVES AROUND TWO CHARACTERS FROM A STORY! And don't try to give any bullsh-t about JKR (or JeRK that's soooo cool and creative after all) changing her mind about who Hermione was going to end up with. JKR has had these books planned out since 1990 when she start PS/SS. And I don't understand how you could have read books 3, 4 and 5 without seeing a R/Hr ship, or if you have seen the 3rd movie not be entirely convinced. I can see how it might be possible to see a H/Hr ship, but R/Hr is just there screaming at you across the pages. Also, I've seen interview quotations from as early as 1999 where JKR has clearly stated that Ron and Hermione will end up together. And if the only reason you are reading Harry Potter is because of the possibility of a H/Hr ship, or its the only reason you are going to stop reading a series of excellent books you are DELUSIONAL. Harry Potter is not about romance it is about Harry's fight agains Voldemort, the romance is just a side-plot to keep the stories more accesible and real. And if you can give me one piece of CREDIBLE information or evidence, a scene/quotation/look between Harry and Hermione or anyone to prove a possible romantic involvement between the two of them I will revoke this comment and revere you as my all-might god.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:34 PM  

  • jkr WRITES the books. possibly it could be left up to her what happens, you know, seeing as its her stuff? i'm sure she wont have a problem if you want to write an alternative version of the books with your harry/hermione ship, but it is not up to people to tell her what to write, she has blatantly had them planned out. i am NOT going to insult you, as that achieves nothing. i am going to give you advice...JKR isnt going to change her books for you or anyone except herself, ad i am sure she wont be to crushed if you stop reading them..that is your choice so, inthe nicest possible way, it is time to get over it and stop embarrassing yourself. the only thing you are achieving is making alot of R/H H/g shippers very smug and get a VERY VERY good laugh. i hope you can realise that the relationships in HP aren't the biggest deal for crying out loud people are starving and you are distraught over being wrong in your shipping?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:04 AM  

  • jkr WRITES the books. possibly it could be left up to her what happens, you know, seeing as its her stuff? i'm sure she wont have a problem if you want to write an alternative version of the books with your harry/hermione ship, but it is not up to people to tell her what to write, she has blatantly had them planned out. i am NOT going to insult you, as that achieves nothing. i am going to give you advice...JKR isnt going to change her books for you or anyone except herself, ad i am sure she wont be to crushed if you stop reading them..that is your choice so, inthe nicest possible way, it is time to get over it and stop embarrassing yourself. the only thing you are achieving is making alot of R/H H/g shippers very smug and get a VERY VERY good laugh. i hope you can realise that the relationships in HP aren't the biggest deal for crying out loud people are starving and you are distraught over being wrong in your shipping?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:04 AM  

  • Hey, although I am a huge R/H fan and H/G fan and I am pretty shocked at the lengths you have gone to, you obviously have a reason for thinking so. I hear about all this H/Hr evidence but never see it. I would appriciate it alot if you could give me some examples so I could (perhaps!) understand where you are coming from. Thanks.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:28 AM  

  • Thanks to the last commenter asking about the evidence. Don't worry, my friend, it's all on the way. But of course it's on other sites as well. But what's with all of you posting as anonymous? Real trolls post with actual screen names...

    By Blogger pumpkinhead, at 12:53 AM  

  • Oi pumpkinhead, what's a "find tooth comb"?

    And don't worry, I never believed the person who said that you went to Princeton. I believe that in the States to go to college you need to fill in special college applications (I'm not entirely sure as I'm not American) - I'm tipping a prerequisite for getting into college is to at least have an application filled out with correct spelling and grammar.

    Good to see you back, mushy pumpkinhead. The "Thugs" are going to enjoy the mockery! >:-D

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:00 AM  

  • You were wrong. Get over it. If you dont like what happened in JKR's books, dont read them. They are her books and she doesnt have to change them for you.
    Simple!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:17 AM  

  • Mushy Pumpkinhead, welcome back, we missed you. I thought the fake Pumpkinhead that was posted on Snowy's petition would flush you out, and it has! Anyway, here is a copy of an email I sent to Snowy just today. It applies as much to you as it does to her:

    Well, firstly Snowy, I would like to point you in the direction of a petition gaining much more support than yours is achieving:

    http://www.petitionspot.com/petitions/loyalty_to_emerson

    Check out the number of signatures, and the actual signature goal. That's right, a realistic target has been passed. The vast majority of signatures are actually SUPPORTING my petition.

    Now I know what you're going to say before you even say it. You will undoubtedly say something along the lines of "The proof is in the numbers, bucko" or something similar. Wrong.

    petition: A formal written request, esp. signed by many people , appealing to authority in some cause.

    Unfortunately, your petition does not apply to this rule for the "cause" of your petition, in other words the statement of your petition, is in fact generating a hell of a lot more abuse and mockery. In reality, the actual amount of GENUINE signatures that SUPPORT your petition still ranks below 100. Besides which, even IF you managed to get a million signatures, that STILL would not be enough. The Harry Potter Series has a LOT more fans than that. HBP did get distributed in what I think was 47 countries after all.

    Here, I am now going to deconstruct the moronic statement of your petition:

    "We, the undersigned, hereby petition Joanne Kathleen Rowling, author of the Harry Potter book series, to immediately apologize for her remarks included in the interview conducted by Emerson of MuggleNet and Melissa of The Leaky Cauldron, in particular the following words:

    "Yes, we do now know that it's Ron and Hermione." "

    This is not the only time that JKR has hinted at the Heron ship being the one that would sail. She also mentioned that Harry and Hermione were very "platonic" friends. Platonic means non-sexual. Plus, there is that ANVIL-SIZED quote that appears in Goblet of Fire in which Harry denies "very firmly" that he fancies Hermione. Even if you don't believe in the Heron ship, that quote alone should have at least given you the sign that Harry/Hermione would never happen. Also, there is the tons of evidence provided by Mina, a lot of which you STILL have not deconstructed. Where are those further "deconstructions" hmm? Did you give up after it turned out that people were deconstructing your deconstructions of the Heron evidence, but no-one was able to deconstruct the deconstructions of your pathetic so-called Harmony evidence that you provided?

    "In addition, we strongly DEMAND that Joanne Kathleen Rowling apologize for laughing at the term "delusional," as it was applied to the millions of Harry/Hermione shippers throughout the world."
    Millions? Hardly. I think you'll find, based on the evidence of the large Heron support in your petition, the Loyalty to Emerson petition, and the Crazy Shipper Ban petition, that Harmony shippers are horribly outnumbered ever since HBP. And she wasn't laughing at the term "delusional", she was laughing at Emerson. After all, Emerson's attitude is "If you don't like it, get off my site." What makes Mugglenet so successful is that while it is the biggest provider of Harry Potter related news, it also reflects the personal opinions of those who write for Mugglenet: that is to say the people who write the editorials, and Emerson himself.

    "We also petition Joanne Kathleen Rowling to rectify the situation in Book 7, clearing up any questions the few Ron/Hermione shippers (the truly "delusional" ones) floating around might have about the one true romantic relationship that matters in the Harry Potter books, that of Harry and Hermione. "

    Have you actually read the book? If you had then you would realise that Heron shippers are not delusional, for it was Ron/Hermione that happened, not Harry/Hermione. You've provided pitifully little Harry/Hermione, where as we truly SANE fans in The Good Fight For Sanity have come up with TONS of evidence. Also, Harry Potter is by no means a romantic novel. Au contraire, the main focus of the books is Harry's continuing battle with Lord Voldemort. The romance in the books is little more than a subplot, rather much like Quidditch, and the lessons which the students take.

    But then again, what would you know about the books? If I may recall, one of your posts on your petition stated that your beliefs are not based on the books, but the MOVIES, saying, and I quote: "Dan and Emma would look so much more cute together" If this was a petition to get Dan and Emma together in REAL LIFE, then you may have a point. After all, lots of examples exist of film couples who have worked together: Tim Burton and Helen Bonham Carter (Charlie and The Chocolate Factory), Johnny Depp used to go out with Winona Ryder (and they did "Edward Scissorhands"), Tom Cruise used to date Nicole Kidman (and they did "Eyes Wide Shut") and of course, there is the "Will they? Won't they?" of Hollywood, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie (Mr and Mrs Smith). However, we're not talking about Dan and Emma, we're talking about Harry and Hermione, and you are still yet to provide solid evidence for the existence of Harry/Hermione.

    "Otherwise, we have no choice but to ban Book 7 when it comes out. As the millions of Harry/Hermione shippers are the only "true" fans of the Harry Potter book series, this action will seriously affect books sales, and will undoubtedly force Bloomsbury and Scholastic to reconsider any future Harry Potter publications."

    This bit is just hilarious. Please learn some grammar lessons: it's BOYCOTT not BAN. And those who are asking JKR to change her books are "true fans"? To quote Dr. Evil: "Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggggggghhhhhhhhhhttttttttttt" Also, what "future Harry Potter publications" do you speak of? In case you haven't noticed, Harry Potter 7 will the last book in the series, and unless JKR decides to release a HP Encyclopaedia (which is highly unlikely considering that detailed HP encyclopaedias already exist on the internet (see Lexicon, Mugglenet, or Wikipedia)), after HP7 there will simply be the movies that will need to happen and then that's it. JKR can put her feet up and have a well deserved rest. Of course, the books will still be open for debate even AFTER they have finished, such will be it's great legacy.

    If you are really wanting a romantic novel, then I suggest that you stop disgracing the internet with your laughable delusions and that you read books by the Brontes, stuff like Pride and Prejudice and Wuthering Heights and Emma. Or if you want something more recent, try His Dark Materials. It fits in with your whole "The Hero and the Heroine find love with each other" logic.

    Now, compare your petition statement, with mine:

    "Shortly after the release of the sixth book in the Harry Potter series: Half Blood Prince, two people, representing two different websites: Mugglenet and The Leaky Cauldron, were lucky enough to interview the great Joanne Kathleen Rowling herself. During the interview, humourous banter was exchanged, particularly on the subject of shippers. Unfortunately, a misinterpretation of the word "delusional" used during the interview led to a petition and an angry web page being created by Otter Snow, or Snowy if you prefer. Otter Snow is a Harry/Hermione shipper who was furious that this ship did not sail in HBP. Her fury can be seen here:

    http://www.geocities.com/otter_snow/ULTIMATE_BETRAYAL

    and of course here:

    http://www.petitionspot.com/petitions/ultimate_betrayal

    But Otter Snow is not the only hostile Harry/Hermione shipper (or "Harmony" shippers if you prefer). There is of course Pumpkinhead, and his site:

    http://harryandhermione4ever.blogspot.com

    Pumpkinhead's resentment of Miss Rowling even stretches to calling her JRK. He, like Otter Snow, is incapable of using decent facts to support his evidence. Instead, he focuses on the so-called "travesty" that "one of the greatest love stories has not been told".

    What both Otter Snow and Pumpkinhead fail to realise is that the Harry Potter series is not, and never will be, centred on the romance. So much more important things happened in HBP, such as the death of an extremely important character, and the issue of whether Severus Snape is truly evil. So to vent anger and abuse at Miss Rowling simply because two characters did not end up together is utterly pathetic.

    Anyway, what with abuse raining in on Miss Rowling and Emerson, we now feel that the time is right to show undying support and loyalty for Mugglenet, a site fronted by Emerson, who actually manages to be extremely funny. And of course the time is right also to pledge support for Miss Rowling in her writing of the books, and of course, support for Book 7.

    Therefore, we the undersigned pledge full loyalty to Emerson and to Miss Rowling.

    Thank you."

    No grammatical errors, no unrealistic aims, hardly any abuse in response, and most importantly, the petition has passed its signature goal of 100 (a realistic target), and still it continues to grow.

    Finally, a haiku.

    Face it, you're losing,

    Sanity's going to triumph,

    Leave while you still can.

    DEAL WITH IT

    SUPPORT BOOK 7

    ALL HAIL MISS TRISH, TIFFI, THE GREY LADY, JONATHAN AND EMERSON: LEADERS OF THE GOOD FIGHT FOR SANITY

    •Emerson's Thugs Rock On Forever•

    RID THE INTERNET OF LUNATICS

    Give Snowy hell from us Peeves...

    "Yes, we do now know that it's Ron and Hermione."

    Get. Over. It.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:44 AM  

  • Good to see the trolls aren't all dead from a lack of food. Welcome to my blog, Jonathan - it's good to see you have the philosophy that the longer your essay, the stronger your point. It's called terseness, my grade 9 english teacher taught it to me.

    Misstrish, it is a pleasure as always. Of course, the pleasure is all yours. (just kidding, you're not too bad. Just really misguiding).

    "Yes, we do now know that it's Ron and Hermione."

    Copy and paste that quote as many times as you want, trolls. It only reinforces my point that JRK is behind all this.

    I

    By Blogger pumpkinhead, at 2:42 AM  

  • Actually, Pumpkinhead, the reason why my "essay" is so long is because there are quotes in there. Did you even bother to read it? I actually made some valid points, but you, like Snowy, ignore them rather than addressing them properly. And as a matter of fact, I've been posting on this blog for quite a while.

    And besides Pumpkinhead, a lot of your posts seem to be quite long. Therefore, I would think that the reverse is true. That it is YOU Pumpkinhead that truly believes the longer the post the stronger the posts.

    There is a key difference between yourself and The Good Fight For Sanity (an organisation created when Snowy's delusional ramblings ended up making her the butt of jokes. The Good Fight For Sanity are also known as Emerson's Thugs, and the main key players of this organisation are Miss Trish, Tiffi, The Grey Lady, myself, Colleen and other non shippers/Heron shippers/Sane Harmony shippers/other shippers) is that the views of people like myself, Miss Trish, Tiffi etc are mostly respected. Your views merely attract mockery and abuse.

    And now for a haiku:

    Deluded moron,
    Harmony didn't happen,
    Get over it fool.

    DEAL WITH IT

    SUPPORT BOOK 7

    ALL HAIL MISS TRISH, TIFFI, THE GREY LADY, JONATHAN AND EMERSON: LEADERS OF THE GOOD FIGHT FOR SANITY

    •Emerson's Thugs Rock On Forever•

    RID THE INTERNET OF LUNATICS

    Give Snowy hell from us Peeves...

    "Yes, we do now know that it's Ron and Hermione."

    Get. Over. It.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:01 AM  

  • Right, now it's time to break out the big weapons, it's time now Pumpkinhead to give you full Heron evidence:

    - Also, at the end of Book 4, Hermione kisses Harry on the cheek but she once again refrains with Ron. This obviously means there is some sort of tension between the two.
    - When Harry sees Hermione at the Yule Ball and doesn't recognise her, it is because she looks pretty. He finds her attractive FOR ONCE. She is never described favourably again.
    - When Malfoy calls Hermione a mudblood for the first time in CoS, Ron does that spell on him that then backfires and makes him "eat slugs". He reacted the strongest of all to this insult, throwing himself at Malfoy in an attempt to hurt him.
    - Hermione and Ron bicker ALL THE TIME in the last few books. If this is not hate/LOVELOVELOVE relationship, then what is? Remember what movie!Snape says to Lupin and Sirius? "Well, well, well, bickering like an old married couple".
    - I believe JKR gave the film makers, particularly Alfonso Cuaron, some insider details for what was yet to come in the books, especially Ron/Hermione. For example, when Harry is approaching Buckbeak, that famous grabbing for Ron's hand that Hermione exhibits? She is embarassed, he is embarrassed, they look away from eachother and even step away. Grabbing for somebody's hand if they are just a friend to you means nothing! You can do it rather easily in fact. But she did it without thinking. And when the three of them see Buckbeak getting his head chopped off, Hermione does that weird sultry putting her arms round Ron, and it is Harry who is forced to try and join the embrace. She is turning to Ron for comfort involuntarily. How lovely.

    Some quotes...

    "You will find that Madam Pomfrey is still awake. She's just giving out Mandrake juice - I daresay the Basilisk's victims will be waking up any moment." [Dumbledore]
    "So Hermione's OK!" said Ron brightly. - CoS

    "Hermione!" Ron groaned (when he saw her petrified).
    -It isn't Harry who reacts, it's Ron, and we see how upset he is.

    "Bet you five Galleons the next one dies. Pity it wasn't Granger -"
    The bell rang at that moment, which was lucky; at Malfoy's last words, Ron had leapt off his stool, and in the scramble to collect bags and books, his attempts to reach Malfoy went unnoticed.
    "Let me at him," Ron growled as Harry and Dean hung onto his arms. "I don't care, I don't need my wand, I'm going to kill him with my bare hands -"
    - Ron is completely enraged, but Harry doesn't react other than to hold him back.

    Ron read the message, swallowed hard, and looked sideways at the empty seat usually filled by Hermione. The sight seemed to stiffen his resolve, and he nodded.
    -The fact Hermione is no longer there makes him want to go find the spiders, the things he hates above all others.

    ".. Five more points from Gryffindor for being an insufferable know-it-all."
    Hermione went very red, put down her hand and stared at the floor with her eyes full of tears. It was a mark of how much the class loathed Snape that they were all glaring at him, because very one of them has called Hermione a know-it-all at least once, and Ron, who told Hermione she was a know-it-all at least twice a week, said loudly, "You asked us a question, and she knows the answer! Why ask if you don't want to be told?" - PoA

    Harry was still thinking about what Malfoy said, while Ron was seething about Snape (for taking five points from Gryffindor because Hermione helped Neville.)
    - STILL seething, really. He is obsessed...

    "You don't think Malfoy did something to her (Hermione)?" Ron said anxiously as they hurried upstairs toward Gryffindor Tower.
    - Worried, how touching.

    Hermione flung her arms around Ron's neck and broke down completely. Ron, looking quite terrified, patted her very awkwardly on the top of the head. Finally, Hermione drew away.
    "Ron, I'm really, really sorry about Scabbers ..." she sobbed.
    "Oh-well-he was old," said Ron, looking thoroughly relieved that she had let go of him. "And he was a bit useless. You never know, Mum and Dad might get me an owl now."
    - This is sexual tension- if you fancy someone and they throw themselves on you it's a bit awkward, and he tries to deal with her in the best way he can, which is not very effectively.

    "If you think they can't spot a Mudblood, stay where you are." [Malfoy]
    "You watch your mouth!" shouted Ron. Everybody present knew that 'Mudblood' was a very offensive term for a witch or wizard of Muggle parentage.
    "Never mind, Ron," said Hermione quickly, seizing Ron's arm to restrain him as he took a step towards Malfoy. - GoF.
    - Again, trying to protect Hermione (see previous 'mudblood' evidence).

    "I hope the others are okay," said Hermione after a while.
    "They'll be fine," said Ron.
    (and then...)
    "Those poor Muggles, though," said Hermione nervously. "What if they can't get them down?"
    "They will," said Ron reassuringly. "They'll find a way."
    - He's making her feel better, constantly (well, twice) reassuring her.

    "Look," said Hermione patiently (to Harry), "it's always you who gets all the attention, you know it is. I know it's not your fault," she added quickly, seeing Harry open his mouth furiously. "I know you don't ask for it...but--well--you know, Ron's got all those brothers to compete against at home, and you're his best friend, and you're really famous--he's always shunted to one side whenever people see you, and he puts up with it, and he never mentions it, but I suppose this is just one time too many...."
    - This just goes to show how much Hermione knows and understands Ron.

    ...Hermione, whimpering in panic was clutching her mouth.
    "Hermione!"
    Ron had hurried forward to see what was wrong with her; Harry turned and saw Ron dragging Hermione's hand away from her face.
    - Where is Harry in all this? It's his fault she got hurt, for pity's sake.

    "Can't you think of anyone who'd go with Ron?" he said, lowering his voice so that Ron wouldn't hear.
    "What about Hermione Granger?" said Parvati.
    - I've always liked Parvati...

    All the good-looking ones taken, Ron?" said Hermione loftily. "Eloise Midgen starting to look quite pretty now, is she? Well, I'm sure you'll find someone somewhere who'll have you."
    But Ron was staring at Hermione as though suddenly seeing her in a whole new light.
    "Hermione, Neville's right -- you are a girl . . ."
    "Oh well spotted," she said acidly.
    Well -- you can come with one of us!"
    "No, I can't," snapped Hermione.
    "Oh come on," he said impatiently, "we need partners, we're going to look really stupid if we haven't got any, everyone else has . . ."
    "I can't come with you," said Hermione, now blushing, "because I'm already going with someone."
    "No, you're not!" said Ron. "You just said that to get rid of Neville!"
    "Oh did I?" said Hermione, and her eyes flashed dangerously. "Just because it's taken you three years to notice, Ron, doesn't mean no one else has spotted I'm a girl!"
    Ron stared at her. Then he grinned again.
    - She seems quite hurt that it took him so long to finally think of her as a date.

    "Hermione -- who are you going to the ball with?" said Ron.
    He kept springing this question on her, hoping to startle her into a response by asking it when she least expected it.
    - Why is he so bothered?

    Hermione came over and sat down in Parvati's empty chair. She was a bit pink in the face from dancing.
    "Hi," said Harry. Ron didn't say anything.
    "It's hot, isn't it?" said Hermione, fanning herself with her hand. "Viktor's just gone to get some drinks."
    Ron gave her a withering look. "Viktor?" he said. "Hasn't he asked you to call him Vicky yet?"
    Hermione looked at him in surprise. "What's up with you?" she said.
    "If you don't know," said Ron scathingly, "I'm not going to tell you."
    Hermione stared at him, then at Harry, who shrugged.
    "Ron, what --?"
    "He's from Durmstrang!" spat Ron. "He's competing against Harry! Against Hogwarts! You -- you're --" Ron was obviously casting around for words strong enough to describe Hermione's crime, "fraternising with the enemy, that's what you're doing!"
    Hermione's mouth fell open.
    "Don't be so stupid!" she said after a moment. "The enemy! Honestly -- who was the one who was all excited when they saw him arrive? Who was the one who wanted his autograph? Who's got a model of him up in their dormitory?"
    Ron chose to ignore this. "I s'pose he asked you to come with him while you were both in the library?"
    "Yes, he did," said Hermione, the pink patches on her cheeks glowing more brightly. "So what?"
    "What happened -- trying to get him to join spew, were you?"
    "No, I wasn't! If you really want to know, he -- he said he'd been coming up to the library every day to try and talk to me, but he hadn't been able to pluck up the courage!"
    Hermione said this very quickly, and blushed so deeply that she was the same color as Parvati's robes.
    "Yeah, well -- that's his story," said Ron nastily.
    "And what's that supposed to mean?"
    "Obvious, isn't it? He's Karkaroff's student, isn't he? He knows who you hang around with . . . He's just trying to get closer to Harry -- get inside information on him -- or get near enough to jinx him --"
    Hermione looked as though Ron had slapped her. When she spoke, her voice quivered.
    "For your information, he hasn't asked me one single thing about Harry, not one --"
    ". . .Why don't you go and find Vicky, he'll be wondering where you are," said Ron.
    "Don't call him Vicky!"
    Hermione jumped to her feet and stormed off across the dance floor, disappearing into the crowd. Ron watched her go with a mixture of anger and satisfaction on his face.
    "Are you going to ask me to dance at all?" Padma asked him.
    "No," said Ron, still glaring after Hermione.
    -A long quote, but it makes my point doesn't it? Ron is on a date with a very pretty girl, one of the prettiest in the year by all accounts, but he is hankering after Hermione. Ron used to be a BIG fan of Krum's, but not anymore. He accuses Krum of following Hermione around just to get to Harry, and this must hurt Hermione's feelings somewhat. In fact, she looks as though she has been 'slapped' by Ron's harsh words.

    [After Krum jumps into the lake]
    "It's a lot colder where he comes from," said Hermione. "I suppose it feels quite warm to him."
    "Yeah, but there's still the giant squid," said Ron. He didn't sound anxious - if anything, he sounded hopeful. Hermione noticed his tone of voice, and frowned.
    "He's really nice, you know," she said. "He's not at all like you'd think, coming from Durmstrang. He likes it much better here, he told me."
    Ron said nothing. He hadn't mentioned Viktor Krum since the ball, but Harry had found a miniature arm under his bed on Boxing Day, which looked very much as though it had been snapped of a small model figure wearing Bulgaria Quidditch robes.
    - Woah! Suddenly he hates the guy?

    'There's something funny, though,' said Hermione ten minutes later, holding her pestle suspended over a bowl of scarab beetles. 'How could Rita Skeeter have known ...?'
    'Known what?' said Ron quickly. 'You haven't been mixing up Love potions, have you?'
    'Don't be stupid,' Hermione snapped, starting to pound up her beetles again. 'No, it's just ... how did she know Viktor asked me to visit him over the summer?'
    Hermione blushed scarlet as she said this, and determinedly avoided Ron's eyes.
    (Notice it's RON'S eyes she's avoiding?!)
    'What?' said Ron, dropping his pestle with a loud clunk.
    'He asked me right after he's pulled me out of the lake,' Hermione muttered. 'After he'd got rid of his shark's head. Madam Pomfrey gave us both blankets and then he sort of pulled me away from the judges so they wouldn't hear, and he said, if I wasn't doing anything over the summer, would I like to -'
    'And what did you say?' said Ron, who had picked up his pestle and was grinding it on the desk, a good six inches from his bowl, because he was looking at Hermione.
    'And he did say he'd never felt the same way about anyone else,' Hermione went on, going so red now that Harry could almost feel the heat coming from her, 'but how could Rita Skeeter have heard him? She wasn't there ... or was she? Maybe she has got an Invisibility Cloak, maybe she sneaked into the grounds to watch the second task ...'
    'And what did you say?' Ron repeated, pounding his pestle down so hard that it dented the desk.
    'Well, I was too busy seeing whether you and Harry were OK to -'
    - Seems to be quite bothered whether she's seeing Krum again or not, doesn't he? And bothered about what she said.

    "And he sneaked up here to search Snape's office!" said Ron triumphantly, looking at Hermione.
    - Triumphantly? He's trying to impress her?

    "You only liked him [Lockhart] because he's handsome," said Ron scathingly.
    "Excuse me, I don't like people just because they're handsome!" said Hermione indignantly.
    - Ron is acting jealous here, perhaps because he is not handsome and therefore thinks Hermione will not like him. Is Hermione reassuring him?

    Hermione told Harry that it would do him good to get away from the castle for a bit, and Harry didn't need each persuasion.
    "What about Ron, though?" he said. "Don't you want to go with him?"
    "Oh ... well..." Hermione went slightly pink. "I thought we might meet up with him in the Three Broomsticks..."
    "No," said Harry flatly.
    - This doesn't say TOO much, but the way Harry said it - "Don't you want to go with him?" - sounds almost like "I thought you preferred to be with him." Hermione just might've got the wrong idea when he said it and blushed.

    Thanks," she (Parvati) said. "Padma's going to meet you in the entrance hall," she added to Ron.
    "Right," said Ron, looking around. "Where's Hermione?"
    "Where is Hermione?" he said again.
    - This happens throughout the period just before the Yule Ball, during the Yule Ball and after. Ron is constantly pressing Hermione's personal life, particularly whom she is going to the Yule Ball with. Hallo, he's about to go on his first date with a girl, and all he can think of is her!

    Ron, however, walked right past Hermione without looking at her. [when she comes out with Krum]
    - Ron shows that he is VERY jealous, and does a terrible job at concealing it.

    "Well, if you don't like it, you know what the solution is, don't you?" yelled Hermione; her hair was coming down out of its elegant bun now, and her face was screwed up in anger.
    "Oh yeah?" Ron yelled back. "What's that?"
    "Next time there's a ball, ask me before someone else does and not as a last resort!"
    Ron mouthed soundlessly like a goldfish out of water as Hermione turned on her heel and stormed up the girls' staircase to bed. Ron turned to look at Harry. "Well," he spluttered, looking thunderstruck, "well - that just proves - completely missed the point-"
    Harry didn't say anything. He liked being back on speaking terms with Ron too much to speak his mind right now - but he somehow thought that Hermione had got the point much better than Ron had.
    - This is as good as any line that tell us Hermione likes Ron. "Next time there's a ball, ask me before someone else does and not as a last resort!" tells the reader that she's hurt that he hadn't approached her first, and that she has feelings for him.

    Krum had come to say Goodbye to Hermione.
    "Could i have a vord?" he asked her.
    "Oh...yes...all right," said Hermione, looking slightly flustered, followed Krum
    through the crowd and out of sight. "You'd better hurry up!" Ron called loudly after her. "The carriages'll be here in a minute!"
    He let Harry keep a watch for the carriages, however, and spent the next few minutes craning his neck over the crown to try and see what Krum and Hermione might be up to. They returned quite soon. Ron stared at Hermione, but her face was impassive.
    - Ron wants to know what is going on. Harry doesn't care.

    "And you, too - you 'elped-" [Fleur]
    "Yeah," said Ron, looking extremely hopeful, "yeah, a bit-"
    Fleur swooped down on him, too, and kissed him. Hermione looked simply furious.
    - Hermione isn't furious that Fleur kissed Harry, is she? Only when it's Ron.

    "We will see each uzzer again, I 'ope," said Fleur, as she reached him, holding out her hand. "I am 'oping to get a job 'ere, to improve my Eenglish."
    "It's very good already," said Ron, in a strangled sort of voice. Fleur smiled at him; Hermione scowled.
    - And again with the not liking Ron fancying Fleur.

    "Who're you writing the novel to, anyway?"
    "Viktor."
    "Krum?"
    "How many other Viktors do we know?
    Ron said nothing, but looked disgruntled. - OotP
    Um, it's just because it's 'Vicky' that he's angry.

    "What does she see in Krum?" Ron demanded, as he and Harry climbed the boys' stairs.
    ------»
    "Yeah, but apart from that," said Ron, sounding aggravated. "I mean, he's a grouchy git, isn't he?"
    - Ron is angry and frustrated at Hermione liking Krum.

    (About Christmas presents) "... and that perfume's really unusual, Ron."
    - Harry gets Hermione a book, something rather impersonal but fitting for someone who likes to read. A perfect present from a friend. Poor, sweet Ron gets her some perfume- something girly, but not really suited for a girl he is trying to impress. It's also the sort of thing a boyfriend would give to his girlfriend.

    "No problem," said Ron. "Who's that for anyway?" he added ...
    - Right after Hermione thanks Ron for giving her the perfume, he, embarrassed, turns the attention onto something else, feeling awkward that Harry is witnessing this and seeing his gift.

    "Good luck, Ron," said Hermione, standing on tiptoe and kissing him on the cheek. "And you, Harry-"
    Ron seemed to come to himself slightly as they walked back across the Great Hall. He touched the spot on his face where Hermione had kissed him, looking puzzled as though he was not sure what had just happened.
    - There is a moment in the books where Hermione kisses Harry goodbye for the holidays, and he thinks nothing of it. In fact, it is not mentioned again in the next paragraph. Because it means nothing. When Hermione kisses Ron on the cheek, he touches the spot, and JK devotes a paragraph to this. Dropping ANVIL SIZED HINTS once again. He's thinking, "Am I just dreaming or did Hermione really kiss me on the cheek?"

    Ron was looking at Hermione suspiciously.
    "You're not still in contact with him [Krum] are you?"
    "So what if I am?" said Hermione coolly, though her face was a little pink. "I can have a pen pal if I --"
    "He didn't only want to be your pen pal," said Ron accusingly.
    Hermione shook her head exasperatedly and ignored Ron, who was continuing to watch her.
    - Ron is 'accusing' towards Hermione concerning Krum. Harry just doesn't care at all.

    "Are you that bad at kissing?" [Ron]
    "Dunno," said Harry, who hadn't considered this, and immediately felt rather worried. "Maybe I am."
    "Of course you're not," said Hermione absently, still scribbling away at her letter.
    "How do you know?" said Ron very sharply. - page 405
    This goes back to Ron's jealousy again. At Hermione's remark that Harry is not bad at kissing, Ron tenses up assuming that perhaps Hermione has been kissing Harry, and that certainly will not do.

    "How would it be ... if I refused to lend you my notes this year?" - Hermione
    "We'd fail our OWL," said Ron. "If you want that on your conscience, Hermione ..."
    "Well, you'd deserve it," she snapped. "You don't even try to listen to him, do you?"
    "We do try," said Ron. "We just haven't got your brains or your memory or your concentration - you're just cleverer than we are - is it nice to rub it in?"
    "Oh don't give me that rubbish," said Hermione, but she looked slightly mollified.
    - She likes his compliments, and let's be honest, what girl wouldn't like her crush complimenting her?

    [Still in Potions class, after Slughorn realises that Harry's "best friend [who] is Muggle-born and the best in the year" is Hermione.] Hermione turned to Harry with a radiant expression and whispered, "Did you really tell him I'm the best in the year? Oh, Harry!"
    "Well, what's so impressive about that?" whispered Ron, who for some reason looked annoyed. "You are the best in the year - I'd've told him so if he'd asked me!" (HBP)
    -Ron is jealous and annoyed at Hermione's response.

    "You can still see where those brains got hold of me in the Ministry, look," said Ron, shaking back his sleeves.
    "And it doesn't hurt that you've grown about a foot over the summer, either," Hermione finished, ignoring Ron."
    "I'm tall," said Ron inconsequentially.
    - Ron's obviously trying to impress Hermione, showing his scars and his height. It's cute.

    What did surprise [Harry] was that when Ron drew level with them, Parvati suddenly nudged Lavender, who looked round and gave Ron a wide smile. Ron blinked at her, then returned the smile uncertainly. His walk instantly became something more like a strut. (...) Hermione, however, looked cold and distant all the way down to the stadium through the cool, misty drizzle, and departed to find a place in the stands without wishing Ron good luck.
    -Hermione's jealous!

    "You did brilliantly, Ron!"
    This time it really was Hermione running towards them from the stands; Harry saw Lavender walking off the pitch, arm in arm with Parvati, a rather grump expression on her face. Ron looked extremely pleased with himself and even taller than usual as he grinned around at the team and at Hermione.
    - Ron loves Hermione's attention, and Hermione is quick to establish the fact that Ron is "hers" to Lavender, who doesn't react well.

    [Hermione says] "Ron, what are you staring at?"
    "Nothing," said Ron, hastily looking away from the bar, but Harry knew he was trying to catch the eye of the curvy and attractive barmaid, Madam Rosmerta, for who he had long nursed a soft spot.
    "I expect 'nothing''s in the back getting more Firewhiskey," said Hermione waspishly.
    - Hermione's reply shows she is peeved with Ron eyeballing some other woman when she's around.

    Harry groaned. Ron, meanwhile, who was attempting to burst the pod in the bowl by putting both hands on it, standing up and squashing it as hard as he could, said angrily, "And this is another party just for Slughorn's favourites, is it?"
    "Just for the Slug Club, yes," said Hermione.
    The pod flew out from under Ron's fingers and hit the greenhouse glass, rebounding on to the back of Professor Sprout's head and knocking off her old patched hat. Harry went to retrieve the pod; when he got back, Hermione was saying, "Look, I didn't make up the name 'Slug Club'-"
    "'Slug Club'," repeated Ron with a sneer worthy of Malfoy. It's pathetic. Well, I hope you enjoy your party. Why don't you try getting off with McLaggen, then Slughorn can make you King and Queen Slug-"
    "We're allowed to bring guests," said Hermione, who for some reason had turned a bright, boiling scarlet, "an I was going to ask you to come, but if you think it's that stupid then I won't bother!"
    Harry suddenly wished the pod had flown a little further so that he need not have been sitting there with the pair of them. Unnoticed by either, he seized the bowl that contained the pod and began to try and open it by the noisiest and most energetic means he could think of; unfortunately, he coul still hear every word of their conversation.
    "You were going to ask me?" asked Ron, in a completely different voice.
    "Yes," said Hermione angrily, "But obviously if you'd rather I get off with McLaggen ..."
    There was a pause while Harry continued to pound the resilient pod with a trowel.
    "No, I wouldn't," said Ron, in a very quiet voice.
    Harry missed the pod, hit the bowl, and it shattered.
    "Reparo," he said hastily, poking the pieces with his wand, and the bowl sprang back together again. The crash, however, appeared to have woken Ron and Hermione to Harry's presence. Hermione looked flustered and immediately started fussing about for her copy of Flesh-Eating Trees of the World to find out the correct way to juice Snargaluff pods; Ron, on the other hand, looked sheepish but also rather pleased with himself.
    "Hand that over, Harry," said Hermione hurriedly, "it says we're supposed to puncture them with something sharp."
    Harry possed her the pod in the bowl, he and Ron both snapped their goggles back over their eyews and dived, once more, for the stump.
    It was not as though he was really surprise, thought Harry, as he wrestles with a thorny vine intent upon throttling him; he had had an inkling that this might happen sooner or later. But he was not sure how he felt about it ... he and Cho were now too embarassed to look at each other, let alone talk to each other; what if Ron and Hermione started going out together, then split up? Could their friendship survive it? Harry remembered the few weeks they had not been talking to each other in the third year; he had not enjoyed trying to bridge the distance between them. And the, what if they didn't split up? What if they became like Bill and Fleur, and it became excruciatingly embarassing to be in their presence, so that he was shut out for good?
    "Gotcha!" yelled Ron, pulling a second pod from the stump just as Hermione managed to burst the first one opem, so that the bowl was full of tubers wriggling like pale green worms.
    The rest of the lesson passed without further mention of Slughorn's party. Although Harry watched his two friends more closely over the next few days, Ron and Hermione did not seem any different except that they were a little politer to each other than usual. Harry supposed he would just have to wait to see what happened under the influence of Butterbeer in Slughorn's dimly lit room on the night of the party.
    - Doesn't this make you want to CRY? I'm so glad it happened. This just killed me. Harry can bloody see it, he always knew it would happen. That bit where he says he isn't sure how he feels about it, it isn't because he is jealous, it's because they could possibly break up.

    "D'you think Hermione did snog Krum? Ron asked abruptly, as they approached the fat lady. Harry gave a guilty start and wrenched his imagination away from a corridor in which no Ron intruded, in which he and Ginny were quite alone-
    "What?" he said confusedly. "Oh ... er ..."
    The honest answer was 'yes,' but he did not want to give it. However, Ron seemed to gather the worst from the look on Harry's face.
    "Dilligrout," he said darkly to the Fat Lady, and they climbed through the portrait hole into the common room.
    - This matters a lot to Ron, duh.

    "You added Felix Felicis to Ron's juice this morning, that's why he saved everything! See! I can save goals without help, Hermione!"
    "I never said you couldn't-Ron, you thought you'd been given it, too!"
    But Ron had already strode past her out of the door with his broomstick over his shoulder.
    "Er," said Harry into the sudden silence; he had not expected his plan to backfire like this, "shall ... shall we go up to the party, then?"
    "You go!" said Hermione, blinking back tears. "I'm sick of Ron at the moment, I don't know what I'm supposed to have done ... "
    And she storem out of the changing room, too.
    Harry walked slowly back up to the grounds toward the castle through the crowd, many of whom shouted congratulations at him, but he felt a great sense of let-down; he had been sure that if Ron won the match, he and Hermione would be friends again immediately. He did not see how he could explain to Hermione that what she had done to offend Ron was kiss Viktor Krum, not when the offence had occured so long ago.

    Harry looked into the corner she was indicating. There, in full view of the whole room, stood Ron wrapped so closely around Lavender Brown it was hard to tell whose hands were whose.
    "It looks like he's eating her face, doesn't it?" said Ginny dispassionately. "But I suppose he's got to refine his technique somehow. Good game, Harry."
    She patted him on the arm; Harry felt a swooping sensation in his stomach, but then she walked off to help herself to more Butterbeer. Crookshanks trotted after her, his yellow eyes fixed upon Arnold.
    Harry turned away from Ron, who did not look like surfacing soon, just in time to see the portrait hole closing. With a sinking feeling he thought he saw a mane of bushy brown hair whipping out of sight.
    He darted forwards, sidestepping Romilda Vane again, and pushed open the prtrait of the Fat lady. The corridor outside seemed to be deserted.
    "Hermione?"
    He found her in the first unlocked classroom he tried. She was sitting on the teacher's desk, alone except for a small ring of twittering yellow birds circling her head, which she had clearly just conjured out of midair. Harry could not help admiring her spellwork at a time like this.
    "Oh, hello, Harry," she said in a brittle voice. "I was just practising."
    "Yeah ... they're - er - really good ..." said Harry.
    He had no idea what to say to her. He was just wondering whether there was any chance that she had not seen Ron, that she had merely left the room because the partu was a little too rowdy, when she said, in an unnaturally high-pitched voice, "Ron seems to be enjoying the celebrations."
    "Er ... does he?" said Harry.
    "Don't pretend you didn't see him," said Hermione. "He wasn't exactly hiding it, was -"
    The door behind them burst open. To Harry's horror, Ron came in, laughing, pulling Lavender by the hand.
    "Oh," he said, drawing up short at the sight of Harry and Hermione.
    "Oops!" said Lavender, and she backed out of the room giggliing. The door swung shut behind her.
    There was a horrible swelling, billowing silence. Hermione was staring at Ron, who refused to look at her, but said with an odd mixture of bravado and awkwardness, "Hi, Harry! Wondered where you'd got to!"
    Hermione slid off the desk. The little flock of golden birds continued to twitter in circles around her head so that she looked like a strange, feathery model of the solar system.
    "You shouldn't leave Lavender waiting outside," she said quietly. "She'll wonder where you've gone."
    She walked very slowly and erectly towards the door. Harry glanced at Ron, who was looking relieved that nothing worse had happened.
    "Oppugno!" came a shriek from the doorway.
    Harry spun round to see Hermione pointing her want at Ron, her expression wold; the little flock of birds was speeding like a hail of fat golden bullets towards Ron, who yelped and covered his face with his hands, but the birds attacked, pecking and clawing at every bit of flesh they could reach.
    "Gerremoffme! he yelled, but with one last look of vindictive fury, Hermione wrenched open the door and disappeared through it. Harry though he heard a sob before it slammed.
    - Oh, poor, wronged Hermione.

    Ron, whose hands still bore scratches and cuts from Hermione's bird attack, was taking a defensive and resentful tone.
    "She can't complain," he told Harry. "She snogged Krum. So she found out someone who wants to snog me, too. Well, it's a free country. I haven't done anything wrong."
    "Harry did not answer, but pretended to be absorbed in the book the were supposed to have read before Charms the following morning (Quintessence: A Quest). Determined as he was to remain friends with both Ron and Hermione, he was spending a lot of time with his mouth shut tight.
    "I never promised Hermione anything," Ron mumbled. "I mean, all right, I was going to go to Slughorn's party with her, but she never said ... just as friends ... I'm a free agent ..."
    Harry turned a page of Quintessence, aware that Ron was watching him. Ron's voice tailed away in mutters, barely audible over the loud crackling of the fire, though Harry thought he caught the words 'Krum' and 'can't complain' again.
    Hermione's timetable was so full that Harry could only talk to her properly in the evenings, when Ron was in any case so tighly wrapped around Lavender that he did not notice what Harry was doing. Hermione refused to sit in the common room while Ron was there, which meant that their conversations were held in whispers.
    "He's at perfect liberty to kiss whomever he likes," said Hermione, while the librarian, Madame Pince, proled the shelves behind them. "I really couldn't care less."
    She raised her quill and dotted and 'i' so ferociously that she punctured a hole in her parchment.

    "Told you," said Hermione succintly. "Sooner you ask someone, sooner you they'll all leave you alone and you cam-"
    But her face suddenly turned blank; she had just spotted Ron and Lavender who were entwined in the same armchair.
    "Well, goodnight, Harry," said Hermione, though it was only seven o'clock in the evening, and she left for the girls' dormitory without another word.

    "... oh, hi, Hermione!"
    Parvati positively beamed. Harry could tell that she was feeling guilty for having laughed at hermione in Transfiguration. He looked around and saw that Hermione was beaming back, if possible even more brightly. Girls were very strange sometimes.
    "Hi, Parvati!" said Hermione, ingnoring Ron and Lavender completely. "Are you going to Slughorn's party tonight?"
    "No invite," said Parvati gloomily. "I'd love to go, though, it sounds like it's going to be really good .. you're going, aren't you?"
    "Yes, I'm meeting Cormac at eight and we're-"
    There was a noise like a plunger being withdrawn from a blocked sink and Ron surfaces. Hermione actes as though she had not seen or heard anything.
    "-we're going up to the party together."
    "Cormac?" said Parvati. "Cormac McLaggen, you mean?"
    "That's right," said Hermione sweetly. "The one who almost" she put a great deal of emphasis on the word, "became Gryffindor keeper."
    "Are you going out with him, then?" asked Parvati, wide-eyed.
    "Oh - yes - didn't you know?" said Hermione, with a most un-Hermione-ish giggle.
    "No!" said Parvati, looking positively agog at this piece of gossip. "Wow, you like your Quidditch players, don't you? First Krum, then McLaggen ..."
    "I like really good Quidditch players," Hermione corrected her, still smiling. "Well, see you ... got to go and get ready for the party ..."
    She left. At once Lavender and Parvati put their heads together to discuss this new developement, with everything they had ever heard about McLaggen and all they had ever guessed about Hermione. Ron looked strangely blank and said nothing. Harry was left to ponder in silence the depths to which girls would sink to get revenge.
    - Jealous much?

    "Serves you right for coming with him [McLaggen]." he [Harry] told her severely.
    "I thought he'd annoy Ron the most," said Hermione dispassionately.

    "Well, yeah," said Ron. He hesitated a moment, then said, "Is Hermione really going out with McLaggen?"
    "I dunno," said Harry. "They were at Slughorn's party together, but I don't think it went very well."
    Ron looked slightly more cheerful as he delved deeper into his stocking.
    - This cheers Ron up, even though he has a girlfriend.

    Hermione gave an almost inaudible sniff. She had been exceptionally quiet all day. Having hurtled, white-faced, up to Harry outside the hospital wing and demanded to know what had happened, she had taken almost no part in Harry and Ginny's obsessive discussion about how Ron had been poisoned, but merelystood beside them, clench-jawed and frightened looking, until at last they had been allowed in to see him.
    - Hermione is terrified at the thought of losing Ron.

    "Then the poisoner didn't know Slughorn very well," said Hermione, speaking for the first time in hours and sounding as though she had a bad head-cold. "Anyone who knew Slughorn would have known there was a good chance he'd keep something that tasty for himself."
    "Er-my-nee," croaked Ron unexpectedly from between them.
    - HE'S SPEAKING HER NAME IN HIS SLEEP! OH GOD! You don't hear him croaking "'Arry", do you?

    "If you don't want to go out with her any more, just tell her," said Harry.
    "Yeah ... well ... it's not that easy, is it?" said Ron. He paused. "Hermione going to look in before the match?" he added casually.
    "No, she's already gone down to the pitch with Ginny,"
    "Oh, said Ron, looking rather glum. "Right. Well, good luck. Hope you hammer McLag- I mean, Smith."
    - Ron is thinking of Hermione whilst talking of his girlfriend.

    "Ah, no!" said Ron, staring horror-struck at the parchement. "Dont say I'll have to write the whole thing out again!"
    "It's OK, we can fix it," said Hermione, pulling the essay towards her and taking out her wand.
    "I love you, Hermione," said Ron, sinking back in his chair, rubbing his eyes weaily.
    Hermione turned faintly pink, but merely said, "Don't let Lavender hear you saying that."
    "I won't, said Ron into his hands. "Or maybe I will ... then she'll ditch me ..."
    - Hermione wishes he did love her.. oh, but he does.

    "Ron, you're making it snow," said Hermione patiently, grabbing his wrist and redirecting his wand away from the ceiling from which, sure enough, large white flakes had started to fall. Lavender Brown, Harry noticed, glared at Hermione from a neighboring table through very red eyes and Hermione immediately let go of Ron's arm.
    "Oh yeah," said Ron, looking down at his shoulders in vague surprise. "Sorry ... looks like we've all got horrible dandruff now ..."
    He brushed some of the fake snow off Hermione's shoulder. Lavender burst into tears. Ron looked immensly guilty and turned his back on her.
    "We split up," he told Harry out of the corner of his mouth. Last night. When she saw me coming out of the dormitory with Hermione. Obviously she couldn't see you, so she thought it had just been the two of us."
    "Ah," said Harry. "Well - you don't mind it's over, do you?"
    "No," Ron admitted. "It was pretty bad while she was yelling, but at least I didn't have to finish it."
    "Coward," said Hermione, though she looked amused.

    They had one of their rare joint free periods after Charms and walked back to the common room together. Ron seemes to be positively light-hearted about the end of his relationshio with Lavender and Hermione seemed cheery, too, though when asked what she was grinning about she simply said, "It's a nice day."

    Ron, he saw, was now holding Hermione and stroking her hair while she sobbed into his shoulder, tears dripping from his own long nose.
    - I know you don't think this is valid, snowy, but it IS, and so I left it in.

    JK evidence...

    Couric: "Any snogging with Hermione?"
    Rowling: [surprised] "Harry and Hermione! Do you think so?"
    Katie Couric: "No, I'm just kidding."
    J.K. Rowling: "Ron and Hermione, I should say. There's more tension there."
    -- From Katie Couric's June 2003 interview with JK Rowling

    "Harry and Hermione are very platonic [platonic means nonsexual] friends. But I won't answer for anyone else. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink."
    -- From a National Press Club Luncheon chat with JK Rowling, October 1999)

    Q: Is it just me, or was something going on between Ron and Hermione during the last half of Goblet of Fire?
    A: "Yes, something's "going on," but Ron doesn't realize it yet. Typical boy."
    -- From a BarnesandNoble.com chat with JK Rowling


    Q: Does Hermione like Ron as more than a friend?
    A: The answer to that is in Goblet of Fire!
    (and haven't I already showed you that there is plenty of that?)
    -- From a BBC chat with JK Rowling, March 12, 2001)

    Movie evidence...

    #1- PS. When Hermione learns that Ron is to sacrifice himself in the chess game, Hermione gets upset and tells him that there must be another way. Did Hermione protest when Harry told her that he needed to go alone and face Voldemort? NO. And also, Hermione couldn't keep still when Ron had fallen from the transfigured chess piece.

    #2- CoS. When Harry moves closer to see the petrified Mrs. Norris, you can see Hermione moving closer to Ron, and they glance at each other. Soon after, Ron and Hermione look at each other again when the students are leaving to go back to their dormitories.

    #3- Hermione: "Do you think he's (Lockhart) alright?"
    Ron: "Who cares?" (Leans into her.)

    #4- The "Hug" scene
    At the very end of the movie, Hermione comes running into the hall to congratulate Harry and Ron. She runs straight up to Harry and hugs him, but then stops herself before hugging ron (who becomes flustered at the idea of hugging her), and instead shakes his hand.
    Hermione feels nothing when she hugs Harry, but is too embarrassed to hug Ron.

    #5 - PoA. The "Move Closer" scene
    While Harry is sneaking through Honeydukes under the invisibility cloak, Ron and Hermione are alone in Hogsmeade looking at the Shrieking Shack. Hermione mentions that it's "the most haunted building in Britian" and then asks "Do you want to move a bit closer?"
    Ron thinks she is talking about them moving closer together and starts getting all flustered, then Hermione realises and adds "to the shrieking shack!"

    #6 - "They Might Have To Chop It"
    This scene is quite funny. After everyone comes out of the Shrieking Shack, Harry and Sirius stand looking at Hogwarts, while Hermione stays back with Ron, whose leg is broken. Hermione asks "is it painful?" and Ron reples, in a very would-be-brave voice, "so painful...it might have to be chopped".
    This can be regarded as just a bit of humour, but you can read that Ron is trying somewhat to be brave in front of, or to impress, Hermione.

    Even Dan Radcliffe sees it...

    "I think these two [Rupert (Ron) and Emma (Hermione)] are going to get together." - Daniel Radcliffe

    "...the sideline story between Ron and Hermione is one of my favorites, as it's just a cover-up so they can get attention of each other. There's a huge amount of sexual tension between them, which is great and provides much-needed comic relief because the film is very depressing and angry." - Daniel Radcliffe
    Lizo: "Do you think Ron and Hermione are suited?"
    Daniel Radcliffe: Yeah absolutely, very much so--they are complete polar opposites but suit each other perfectly."

    Now Pumpkinhead, we want TONS of quotes that support Harry/Hermione. Failure to do so will suggest two things:

    a) that you cannot find any

    b) More Heron evidence exists in the books.

    Have fun!

    DEAL WITH IT

    SUPPORT BOOK 7

    ALL HAIL MISS TRISH, TIFFI, THE GREY LADY, JONATHAN AND EMERSON: LEADERS OF THE GOOD FIGHT FOR SANITY

    •Emerson's Thugs Rock On Forever•

    RID THE INTERNET OF LUNATICS

    Give Snowy hell from us Peeves...

    "Yes, we do now know that it's Ron and Hermione."

    Get. Over. It.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:11 AM  

  • If Harry and Hermione had ended up together, would the Half Blood Prince still have been a crap book? And the point of everybody getting together with someone else was that Voldemort can be vanquished by LOVE, and probably that alone. Everybody gettin' it on (if you'll excuse my colloquialism) only proves that, and highlights JKR's meaning. And drop this JRK business, it's not smart.
    "Yes, we do now know that it's Ron and Hermione."
    PS. Snazzy layout.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:00 AM  

  • I agree with Jonathan, The Grey Lady, Colleen, Tiffi, MissTrish and Mina, who appear to be leading the Good Fight for Sanity. This blog is hilarious. Have fun trying to dissect the Heron evidence that the people I mentioned above handed to you.
    A fan of the books.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:06 AM  

  • Oh, right. You're true fans of the books and yet you're insisting that JKR (and no, not JRK) has to change her own works? Hello, she wrote them, she's been planning them even before she started PS/SS, so she can do whatever the heck she wants with them!!! Fine, if you don't like them, you aren't true fans, so stop talking about these things like you think you know better. This blog is absolutely hopeless if you think you're going to get R/Hr shippers to get on your side-you're just giving them a great laugh. My friend used to be an H/Hr shipper because she identified with Hermione and thought that Harry would be best for her. I can understand that. Of course, after reading book 6, she saw that it really couldn't get any more obvious, so she grudgingly agreed that it had to be R/Hr. See, if she could admit she was wrong, so can you! However grudgingly you go through it, however many idiot blogs, websites, petitions whatever you make, it's still possible. But while you still go through denial, I'll just say thank you for the great laugh. I'd put up evidence for the ships, but that's been taken care of. So I'll just pose one question: Where is the glaringly obvious information that Harry loves Hermione?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:04 AM  

  • Ahhh... so nice to be around the crazies.
    HBP as a tabloid-like publication? Au contraire, dear. As an English Lit major, I must defend a work of brilliant literature.
    An amazing plot, if I do say so myself. Full of twists, turns, and surprises at every bend. JK has pulled out all the stops, answering questions, setting us up for great things in Book Seven. We're seeing Literature at its best here, with so many brilliant and basic principles. I quiver in excitement everytime I think about what's to come.
    Get past the romance, see what's really before your eyes! Literature! Brilliant storytelling!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:51 AM  

  • Jonathan, You are the man!

    Oh dear pumpkinhead, stop acting like a three year old and act like a Princeton graduate like you claim to be(though it looks like a load of malarky to me). Also if you hate the book so much, why do you still have it? there are plenty of poor children who would love to read it. Have you noticed anything about Tom Riddle's past, the horcruxes, the Half-Blood Prince, and most importantly; Dumbledore's murder by said Half-Blood? I liked reading the romance parts because I belived them to be humorous (Especially Bill and Fleur, how come I did not see any foreshadowing in GOF). Pumpkinhead, stop acting like a troll yourself. I know people who choose diffrent identities in the internet(I have read TIME magazine). You seem more like a whiney teenager with too much time on your hands. If you want romance, watch and/or Sense and Sensibility (if you can stay awake).

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 1:41 PM  

  • Pumpkinhead, you make me laugh. Any chance that evidence you're planning to show will surface within the next two weeks? I'd love to see what you come up with. Though, seriously, I stand with what I said in the comments in the blog above this. You should really stop concentrating on the Harry Potter stuff and try to write your own novels. You could write some really creative material if you put your mind to it! (So by "close" do you mean you went to college in New Jersey? Or close as in it's one of the top ranking colleges in the US?)

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:58 PM  

  • haha. you're sad & pathetic. but mostly pathetic. I love how you try to use big words to "get your point across" but the only point you make is that YOU don't know what the hell you are talking about. Reading your blog is like reading what a cranky pre-teen would write about such a subject.
    hahahahaha.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:30 PM  

  • Man, this is some funny shit! I can't believe that there are folks out there that get this bent out of shape over a pair of fictional characters not getting together. >_<

    I'm not going o give you the evidence towards R/H (Because I'm not a fan of them either, and even so, you won't take the blinders off anyway), but flaming people that disagrees with you only makes you look stupid.

    And JKR doesn't owe you or anyone else a damn thing. Not even Harry's survival in the next book. And speaking of which, she won't miss the money from both the people who have decided to boycott the book. Just to let you know.

    Please, PLEASE, get another hobby. This just isn't healthy.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5:57 PM  

  • "JRK"? Oh, how clever.

    First of all, do you realize that by publicly ridiculing JKR you're only contradicting yourself? You're calling a woman an idiot at the same time as emphasizing your obsession over the fiction she created.

    And most importantly: NO SELF-RESPECTING READER SHOULD EVER TELL AN AUTHOR TO REWRITE A PUBLISHED NOVEL!!!

    Asking an author to take back what has already been written and published is like asking a mother to kill her child because the child was born with blue eyes and some distant relative wanted a grey-eyed child. It's simply wrong, and anyone who's ever writen a novel understands that to a point.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 6:14 PM  

  • As I've said before on the comments of another entry, please don't say that they're acting like cranky preteens. I'm one myself, though maybe not the cranky part. Although there IS one person I know who might've done something like that, only on a different subject...*thinks* Anyway, people, keep up the Good Fight For Sanity! All Hail Sane Shippers!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:08 AM  

  • Out of curiosity, I'm new to the world of HP, so could you please tell me what your reasons are for Harry and Hermione being together? I saw the movies and I also think they'd be great together, but maybe there's other stuff in the books. Thanks in advance!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:37 PM  

  • I think this has been said before, but there is barely any evidence, something that Snowy and Pumpkinhead have yet to realize...

    Oh yeah, and it seems that a lot of my HP-reading friends were H/Hr Shippers who simply wanted it to happen. They've taken their losses quite gracefully. Take note of that and follow their examples. *meaningful glance*

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 8:23 AM  

  • To the author of the petition:

    I would go to the lengths others have to discuss salient points, but you haven't heard a word said. It would be one thing to reasonably treat those who disagreed with you with discussion, but it seems you prefer screams and flames to any sort of coherent thought. It's a shame, really.

    To this end, I won't waste my hands and spend half a day carefully detailing my disagreement with you, when so many people have already put forth that good effort. Instead, I'll hand it to you in bullet points, so you can have a breakdown to flame, as opposed to building a decent discourse:

    -You are a blathering idiot, crawling out of a cave sweaty and stinking.

    -I hope that this petition and site is just an elaborate prank made to weed the stupid from the herd and identify them.

    -Rowling's books are just that: Rowling's books. If you don't like the way the story goes, don't read them.

    -Read the veritable ton of fanfiction that graces the internet. It has plenty of the Hermione/Harry material already.

    Enjoy,
    Melissa Wintrix

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 6:12 AM  

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